Posted by: Allan Beveridge
« on: September 29, 2011, 06:56:09 PM »It is a very good question. Can I post it in FB sometime? I'll attach your name and website
"I would say a gift of compassion toward myself."
That would be a great gift to share, Saida. And I know Kevin Baker would agree with, as do I, "a gift of challenging stagnant thought processes through laughter."
I also agree with the gift one might choose not to share that you have mentioned, for the same reason "I think I also have a gift that I shouldn't share even though sometimes I don't listen to myself and do it. It is a gift of being able to see some people's landscapes even those that they themselves don't see sometimes. You can't just share gifts unless you learn or develop some skills to do it in a way that sharing make sense to others."
Saida, I try to walk the thin edge between encouraging and pushing others. I am sure there is much room for improvement. I try to remember what I said to whom and why lol so I can at least try to see if I am helping or not. And it is different with different people. What I try to do is get a read on the persons intent and desire. Those that have the desire to make change often need encouragement that their desire isn't misplaced and their intent is correct and for those with the intent and who are working on pushing themselves, I try share with them reasons for finding the desire along with looking for a way to help them clarify and align their intent.
It is those who struggle with both that are the most challenge. The tendancy to elevate the "teacher" is natural, and healthy so long as the teacher works to do two things: first, to not encourage too much focus on the teacher and put the onus back on them to be self relfective, and second to work towards the "student" elevating themselves in their own minds. Both help to narrow the gap they perceive between the teacher and the student. The reason it is is hard is that people are often unsure of themselves and at the same time there needs to be surity in the teacher. This is what creates the gap and why I try to share aspects of my own life so they don't have too many illusions about my "grandeur"
I do like how you think, Saida! Thanks for sharing your thoughts about it.
"I would say a gift of compassion toward myself."
That would be a great gift to share, Saida. And I know Kevin Baker would agree with, as do I, "a gift of challenging stagnant thought processes through laughter."
I also agree with the gift one might choose not to share that you have mentioned, for the same reason "I think I also have a gift that I shouldn't share even though sometimes I don't listen to myself and do it. It is a gift of being able to see some people's landscapes even those that they themselves don't see sometimes. You can't just share gifts unless you learn or develop some skills to do it in a way that sharing make sense to others."
Saida, I try to walk the thin edge between encouraging and pushing others. I am sure there is much room for improvement. I try to remember what I said to whom and why lol so I can at least try to see if I am helping or not. And it is different with different people. What I try to do is get a read on the persons intent and desire. Those that have the desire to make change often need encouragement that their desire isn't misplaced and their intent is correct and for those with the intent and who are working on pushing themselves, I try share with them reasons for finding the desire along with looking for a way to help them clarify and align their intent.
It is those who struggle with both that are the most challenge. The tendancy to elevate the "teacher" is natural, and healthy so long as the teacher works to do two things: first, to not encourage too much focus on the teacher and put the onus back on them to be self relfective, and second to work towards the "student" elevating themselves in their own minds. Both help to narrow the gap they perceive between the teacher and the student. The reason it is is hard is that people are often unsure of themselves and at the same time there needs to be surity in the teacher. This is what creates the gap and why I try to share aspects of my own life so they don't have too many illusions about my "grandeur"
I do like how you think, Saida! Thanks for sharing your thoughts about it.